Self-Love - marykatekopec.com

MK’s Life’s Lessons to Pass On

As my recent round of students are finding their way from my coaching into their new academic and life futures, I created a list of life nuggets I’ve gained to hopefully help guide them as they navigate life.

They loved what I shared so much and suggested I pass it on, just in case it helps more than just them. So by request, here are some of my meaningful nuggets. I hope they find you with the love, peace, calm, wellness, happiness, and goodness in my heart and with the positivity of intent I hope for. Hugging you so big, and loving you even bigger!!!

Always make sure your car has good hiking boots! Good treads saves lives, people!!!

Protect your Love: do a project with your proposed human. Learn how you think and process information differently. Learn how you communicate. Learn what your strengths and weaknesses are while working together to achieve a shared goal. This knowledge and insight will help you direct your growth together, and it will help you understand each other as you take on the shared goal of living a life together [one of the biggest projects out there!].

Choose to grow your wellness by focusing on anti-inflammatory foods and activities. (Vegan and vegetarian diets have been linked to harder peri-menopause and menopause experiences. Which doesn’t mean go hog wild eating meats all the time. Eat high quality, nutritious foods, hydrate, rest, get movement into your body, and make time to rest and recuperate.)

Calorie and iron load the week before your monster. Your body is about to perform surgery on itself without your permission and without caring about all the stuff on your list of things to do. NOURISH big time. Prepare. Help your body cope and heal. Give yourself what you need to navigate the biological upheaval known as your “period.”

Be kind to yourself – self-care. The lists, the to-do’s, … we’re industrious, productive, multi-tasking, trying-to-get-the-most-outta-life women. Everything we have to do will be there, always, for as long as you keep adding to the list. But remember, you’ll only get as far as your body will take you, and although it may feel like you can keep pushing yourself without a break, your body is keeping score towards your depletion, and your body will drop your ass without asking and without apology. The thing is, when this happens, you then have to heal and recuperate, and who knows how long that will take. But it will take long enough to mess up your plans, lists, and to-do’s. So learn to be kind to you. To self-care. To value you. To care about you and what your body, mind, and soul needs to keep being your awesome self. To live your life in a more loving, caring, nurturing way. And build this into your life. Because you are important. Because you are worthy.

Make friends with loving, supportive, caring people and invest in these relationships. Your life will be the richest it possibly can be when it is filled with the love and goodness of good people being there for you, sharing time with you, witnessing you!

Consider “unity” seating instead of a bride and groom side. After all, your guests have come to support you as a couple, not to take sides.
Consider only inviting people you know in your heart will be in your life 10 years from now. After all, your wedding is a day/moment to celebrate the joining of 2 people and 2 lives into 1 couple sharing a life together. If a potential guest won’t be in your lives 10 years from now, why is it important for them to be there to witness and celebrate your union?
Consider your wedding day for what it is, a celebration of you and your love muffin joining together, committing to each other, and choosing to undertake the big ol’ project of living life together, no matter what happens, no matter how hard it gets, sharing in the absolute joys of good times, and holding each other especially tight in the challenging times. Your wedding day is not a party for other people. It’s not a reason to drink to excess. It’s a celebration of your love and your commitments to each other. It is the very definition of joy, happiness, love, and goodness. It’s VERY personal. You should only be surrounded by love, light, support, and happiness!
Consider ensuring your shared day reflects each of you equally. Imagine what that looks like and plan for that. Have conversations. Be together. Start off in equality, and live in it for life!

Reflection with attention to your lessons learned, values, self-knowledge, and the “why’s” of reason beyond simple answers is the key to your forward growth and happy, healthy future. If you allow your past to be an unchecked compass for your future, you’ll very likely find yourself unfulfilled, unhappy, … waiting.

Choose you and be your own best friend, for there is no one you will ever spend more time with in your life!

Know that wellness, peace, calm, happiness, kindness, gratitude, love, and light are yours for the creating … if you are willing to value you, love you, be kind to you, and have patience with yourself!

Live a meaningful life … meaning … let it mean something to you. Envision you in your future and look back … what have you accomplished, grown, achieved, become that makes you feel good and worthy? Whatever that is, it’s your meaningful life, and it’s waiting for you. (psst … also, um, quick note … as you live and grow and learn, this idea, this notion, this “what it takes to live a meaningful life” can and will likely change. It’s okay. You’ll adapt and adjust and keep on growing, learning, and living. You’ve got this! In short:

Find you. Live life. Gain experiences. Grow. Learn. Find you. Rinse and repeat. You will not be the same person you are today, not even a week from now. Not tomorrow. Not years from now. Life grows you and changes you … true … but the cool part is … if you navigate your life with reflection (see earlier point), you’ll grow yourself right on into the person you love … into being your own best friend!

However, it’s also not the norm. Bat shit crazy terrible awful doesn’t happen all of the time.
Notice how uncertainty got immediately lumped into bat shit crazy terrible awful? We’re funny like that. Probably cuz we don’t mind the happy uncertainty. If someone showed up at your door telling you you’ve won the thing you want to the most, you’d be all like, SQUEE, this is awesome! Not scared of it. Uncertainty is lumped with negativity, cuz it’s only the unexpected bad stuff that traumatizes us. Scares us. Teaches us to be afraid of uncertainty.
If living without being afraid of life is important to you, find a way to live in peace with the uncertainty, knowing that pretty much on a regular basis, you got this. In all of the other times, lean back, lean on, share the burden and the weight with your loved ones, your support group, your peeps … the ones who mean the world to you, and you mean the world to them.
And one final note … I am finding that if each day you live the goodness in your heart, be you, do you … then no matter what happens … you will live the life you should be living, your most meaningful life!

Honestly … the short of it is …

Seek an anti-inflammatory way of life … this means wellness for you physically, mentally, and emotionally (ditch the peeps who bring shiz into your life) … Live with gratitude, love, laughter, kindness, light, hugs, … goodness. Choose you.

And know I will be here for you forever!

Love and Big Hugs,

Mary Kate :0)

Self-Love and Self-Care with Positive Reaffirmation

Self-Care and Self-Love with Positive Reaffirmation. Mary Kate Kopec. Love and Big Hugs.

Hello Beautiful Bright Stars!

If repetition is key, then tell yourself how much you love you. Tell yourself kind things. Tell yourself supportive things. Give yourself positive reaffirmation every day. Self-Love and Self-Care with Positive Reaffirmation is POWERFUL!!!

We are constantly bombarded with so much negativity and drama, every single day. It’s in our news, our social media, and our entertainment. It’s in our daily lives. Depression and anxiety rates are up. And for anyone who has ever been in an abusive relationship, one of the first truths that holds is “if you hear it long enough, you begin to believe it.”

This is a form of reaffirmation. And reaffirmation is POWERFUL. When subjected to it negatively, it diminishes and disempowers us. It brings our lives and our mental and emotional well-being down, which in turn impact our physical well-being negatively.

BUT, when practiced POSITIVELY, reaffirmation can powerfully change your life for the better. So MUCH BETTER!

So let’s use this POSITIVE REAFFIRMATION POWER for AWESOME Transformation in our lives!!!

Repetition Is Key! Repeat goodness to yourself every day!

And remember, the only relationship you have complete control over in your life is the relationship you have with you … so repeating goodness to yourself every day is something that is completely in your control!

Self-Love and Self-Care yourself with Positive Reaffirmation to transform you and put that smile on your face and the glow in your heart!

I talk about my POSitudes … a POSitude to me is a positive statement of love, reaffirmation, support, self-care, kindness, gratitude, and giant PINK & LOVE filled hugs! POSitudes are gentle reminders and guidance I use daily to support myself and that I share with you to help you live a happier and healthier life.

For me, my POSitudes and POSitude cards are vital and amazing and wonderful! I keep my cards on my desk and near me all the times. And for today, I want to focus on some of the positive reaffirmations that are incredibly meaningful to me. I encourage you, please, if repetition is key, then tell yourself how much you love you. Be kind to you. Tell yourself supportive and nice things. Tell yourself these things:

I am loved!
I am irreplaceable!
I am wonderfully unique with a light that only shines when I am in the room … the world needs my light!

I am enough!
I am needed!
My heart is big and beautiful!

I can do this!
Every little bit I do is better than not doing anything at all!
I am strong, and I will heal!

I am worthy of my love, kindness, and patience!

It’s Valentine’s, and I love any day dedicated to love. Especially now more than ever when there seems to be so much negativity in the world. So for this month of love, take that first step … self-love and self-care yourself with positive reaffirmations. Use the POWERFUL tool of transformation to enlighten and empower you! Be kind to you. Say nice things to yourself. Think of something you like about yourself and remind yourself of it daily. Tell yourself supporting things. Hug yourself! Big Time!!! Put the smile on your face and the glow in your heart for your happiness and healthiness! Love you!

Until next week …

Keep telling yourself positive, happy things about you! Self-love and self-care yourself with POSitive Reaffirmations!!! Give yourself the power you need to transform you and your life into the happiness and healthiness you want for you!

Be my Valentine! I love you with my big, happy, PINK heart, and I’m hugging you so SQUEEtastically tight!

Love and Big Hugs,

More Happiness from Mary Kate

Find more happiness, love, big hugs, support, gratitude, POSitude, and Self-Care in these POSitude cards!

Needing some self-care, love and support? Wanting hugs? Treat yourself or someone you love to these Big Loving, Big Hugging daily inspirational, motivational, and empowering POSitude cards! They really can make a big difference in your day!!!

POSitude Cards. Mary Kate Kopec. Love and Big Hugs! Found at Etsy

Get Your POSitude On!

Feel happier! Supported! Loved! Hugged!

Bring brightness and goodness into your day, and into your life!

What beautiful souls like you think about their POSitude cards!

These cards are colorful and cheerful! They stay on my desk at work and have made for great conversation with colleagues. I look forward to choosing my daily pick me up. I reflect on my current mood or what inspiration I need for the day. I do have a few favorites that I’ve used more than once or have displayed longer than just a day.

These cards remind me to stay positive and believe in myself!

Stephanie Shay, 4th grade teacher

I love my POSitude cards! I pick one to display on my refrigerator for the week. Reading the card makes me happy and gives me a variety of ways to stay positive in my daily life. It has also become a conversation piece for all who enter my kitchen.

Karen Henry, Retired 4^th Grade Teacher, Personal Assistant

The Positude cards have made a difference for setting the tone during meetings. I have set them in the middle of the meeting table and while we are settling in, people pick them up and read them. This small gesture makes a huge difference in the quality of the conversations we have during our 1:1 meetings.

Mary Freer, University Research Department Administrator

I love my POSitude cards! They are so cute, and the messages are very uplifting and inspiring!

Mary McMurtry, Retired Bookkeeper, Mom, Grandmom

Get inspired every day with a deck of my new POSitude cards! Each deck has 35 different full-color, fun, happy POSitudes (36 cards total, with one card sharing suggestions on how to get the most out your POSitudes.) Available in my Etsy shop. Check them out and learn more, now!

You can find these POSitude cards in my new ETSY shop!!!

Looking for self-care to share love and big hugs for all ages?

How a treasured friendship lost gave me something life changing to be grateful for! Lub's Very Happy Day! Mary Kate Kopec. Love and Big Hugs.

Lub’s Very Happy Day! is filled with delightful brightness and big huggy smiles!

Lub is the happiest, PINKest, most love-filled monster, Ever! Her big, PINK heart is always with her, and it beams brightly in everything she does!

Lub loves you!

Join Lub as she shares with you her love and very happy, monster-ifically delightful day! Feel playful and bright, smile big, and be happy! Have fun and be cheerful!

You can find copies of Lub’s Very Happy Day! to adopt at Amazon!

Be Love

Hello Beautiful Lights of Love!

I’m a week late and a cherry dessert Danish recipe shy, but my dad died last week, and between coping with his loss, family drama and trauma, and my chronic fatigue, I find I’m struggling. So for now, let’s talk about the message that beats loudest in my heart, body, and soul: Be Love.

I promise I’ll get you that recipe, but for today, in this month of love, let’s talk love.

To me, there are 3 big hearts in Being Love:

Surround yourself with love
Share your love with others
Love yourself

Surround yourself with love

There’s a saying out there that says you are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with. It’s an interesting idea, and one I believe in. People who stand by you and bring you up help you be your best self; whereas people who do the opposite, make it so much harder for you to be your best self. Living in POSitivity, happiness, love, kindness, and support is heartwarming, smile making, and energizing; whereas, dealing with criticism, angst, sadness, frustration, and drama drags us down and saps us of our energy. So pick your people well.

Find people who love you and who you love. Create your world of love and support by filling it with people who care about you and love you!

Share your love with others

Be it friends. Family. Your special human. Fur babies. All of these. Grow your love by giving it to others and sharing it. Build on commonalities. Experience new things together. Strengthen your relationships with POSitivity and acts of kindness. Be thoughtful and learn more about each other.

And in this month of love, I challenge you to grow your love even more by giving of yourself to someone in need. Make someone’s day. Pick any person who you feel needs a little extra love, help, kindness, and be an expression of love for them. Brighten their day. It doesn’t have to cost money. Just do something that is thoughtful for them. Something that lets them know they are not alone. That someone cares about them. That they are worthy. Quite simply, the difference we need to make in the world starts with each of us.

Imagine how much happiness we can make by being thoughtful for someone in need, giving him or her some love, kindness, and attention. It’s a beautiful thing!

Love yourself

This is the one I think is hardest for most. We’ve been taught to be self-critical to succeed and excel in a competitive world. I feel like we’ve learned not to be patient with ourselves. We’ve learned to be excessively critical and unforgiving. We say mean things to ourselves. Undermining untruths. Have you ever said to yourself things like: I’m so fat. I’m not pretty enough. I’m not that smart. Or maybe you’re a little craftier about it and less direct. Perhaps you say things like: She’s so thin. She’s so pretty. She’s so smart, … all the while using those statements as quiet comparisons to judge yourself by.

It’s amazing and daunting how automatic we can be in self-degradation. And the thing is, in actuality, it’s self-abuse. There’s a destructive effect that comes with constantly telling ourselves negative things about ourselves. If we tell ourselves these negative things long enough, we can start to believe them. It works the same as if someone else is saying negative things to us.

We haven’t really been taught to approach ourselves with kindness, love, and patience. We could instead say things like, “I’m going to find ways to eat and live healthier,” if we feel we are overweight. Or, “I am going to find a haircut that highlights my striking cheekbones, or brightens my eyes,” if we don’t feel confident about the way we look. Or even, “I’m going to learn and experience something new to grow my knowledge-base,” if we feel we could know more.

If repetition breeds belief, then start telling yourself positive things. Good things for you to know and believe about yourself. Reaffirmation is POWERFUL!!! Use it to grow your self-love and self-confidence. And in the areas where you feel you need growth and improvement – give yourself the patience and time you need to grow and learn new things. To become the reality of yourself you want to become. Love yourself!

So in this month of love, I challenge you to tell yourself something positive about yourself each day, even if it is the same thing every day, all month long. Find something you like/love about yourself and tell yourself out loud every day this wonderful thing. It can be something you’re good at like, “I am kind kind to others!” Or it can be something about you physically like, “I have a bright smile!” Or even something emotional/mental like, “I am resilient!” Pick anything – one thing or even many things – and keep reminding yourself every day of the goodness in you. Reaffirm yourself. Love yourself, even if one little bit at a time … because I promise you, you are worth your love!

Until next week …

Loving you Big Time and Hugging you Tightly!!! Remember, surround yourself with love, share your love with others, and love yourself. Together we will make life a happier place to be!

Love and Big Hugs,

More Happiness from Mary Kate

Find more happiness, love, big hugs, support, gratitude, POSitude, and Self-Care in these POSitude cards!

Get Your POSitude On!

Feel happier! Supported! Loved! Hugged!

Bring brightness and goodness into your day, and into your life!

What beautiful souls like you think about their POSitude cards!

These cards remind me to stay positive and believe in myself!

Stephanie Shay, 4th grade teacher

Karen Henry, Retired 4^th Grade Teacher, Personal Assistant

Mary Freer, University Research Department Administrator

I love my POSitude cards! They are so cute, and the messages are very uplifting and inspiring!

Mary McMurtry, Retired Bookkeeper, Mom, Grandmom

You can find these POSitude cards in my new ETSY shop!!!

Looking for self-care to share love and big hugs for all ages?

Lub’s Very Happy Day! is filled with delightful brightness and big huggy smiles!

Lub is the happiest, PINKest, most love-filled monster, Ever! Her big, PINK heart is always with her, and it beams brightly in everything she does!

Lub loves you!

Join Lub as she shares with you her love and very happy, monster-ifically delightful day! Feel playful and bright, smile big, and be happy! Have fun and be cheerful!

You can find copies of Lub’s Very Happy Day! to adopt at Amazon!

Focus On What You Can Do

Dear Gorgeous Souls!

Focus on what you can do, and you will feel a happier and healthier difference in your life!

Here’s you walking along in all your sunshiny potential …

…when suddenly, DRAMA!

It could be you caught a news clip. Or you got some bad news. Or someone is mean to you. … This list can unfortunately go on and on, as I’m sure you know. Life can be like that. But drama happens with you willingly engaging in it, or with it [drama] trying to force itself on you.

Either way … drama is not good. It’s a downward spiral that can lead to stress, which leads to inflammation, which leads illness, disease, and even for some, death. Wuuuuut????

The bottom line: Unhappiness hurts you!

But there is a solution here. It’s easily said, but if you are a drama junkie, it’s not so easily done. Drama is eye catching. It incites the senses. It irks you. Compels you to engage and respond. You’ve got experiences. Opinions. Facts. Feelings. And the energy drama can stir up inside you can’t stay in there. It needs to get out of you. You need to express yourself. Be heard. Be important.

The problems is that a lot of the time, how we express ourselves in the midst of drama isn’t always helpful. It doesn’t fix the problem. It doesn’t resolve the issue. And we end up going around and around with our drama and the stress it creates, and the downward spiral goes even deeper.

Thank goodness we have the power of choice in our own lives! And the “simple” solution that we can choose:

Focus On What YOU CAN DO!

If it’s a situation, relationship, a moment in time, or an experience happening around you, near you, or with you stuck in the middle, ask yourself: Is this something I can personally fix? Is there something I can do to help resolve this situation or make it better? Do I really need to be around this person? Do I really need to do this thing?

If the answer is NO, get out of there! If you can’t help, but you are engaging anyway, you are putting yourself into a moment that will make you feel helpless or inert or some other negative something … but if there’s nothing you can do, except be in the middle of whatever it is, you are taking on an unnecessary stress burden. And the negativity you gain from it is something that you will then have to deal with for yourself. Why do that to yourself?

If the answer is yes – FANTASTIC! You can make a difference, and that can make you feel really good! You can have a positive impact and feel useful! So then:

figure out what you can do
make an action plan
do your action plan
then get out of there!!!

Be effective! Make a difference! Then move on!!! And heal yourself from any lingering stress that came from the efforts of helping resolve or fix the drama!

If it’s informational, ask yourself this: Is this something I need to learn or know? What do I need to learn from it or know about it?

If the answer is NO, get out of there! If you don’t need to know it; if it won’t grow you, help you become a better person, etc; if it isn’t something that will help you become more informed so you can make better choices, then … honestly … you don’t need to know it. It’s information that will only burden you unnecessarily.

But if the answer is yes – FANTASTIC! It’s an opportunity to grow you, become a more informed person … all you have to do is handle the difficulty of whatever the dramatic informational moment is. So:

learn it
know it
then get out of there!!!

So let’s take a quick moment to talk about how to activate your choice. How can you focus on what you can do? Well, start by asking yourself the questions above, and then, if you find yourself having to engage in the drama – set limits and establish boundaries. And if you don’t have to engage in the drama, then eliminate it from your life entirely.

Setting limits and boundaries comes in handy for negative or toxic people or situations in your life you are not prepared to stop engaging in yet, or that you don’t know yet how to stop engaging in.

When you have to engage in the drama:

set your limits and boundaries
stick to them (Value yourself. Love yourself. And be strong for you!)
get in, get done, get out
then self-care and TLC yourself back into wellness!

Eliminating the drama entirely from your life comes in handy for easier, less complicated dramas … like when the media jerks us around like string puppets, playing on our emotions, over sensationalizing the mundane or insignificant, etc. We really don’t need that in our lives, so tuning out, turning it off, and ignoring it is a great step to protecting ourselves: emotionally, mentally, physically … the whole of us.

For self-care, remember to do things like:

yoga
smiling
walking
eating something nutritious & healing
journaling
deep breathing
taking magnesium supplements
practice gratitude and POSitude
use your happiness toolbox
doing whatever positive, self-loving thing you can to help you heal!

As a general intention to help you be happy and healthy, separate yourself from all of the drama you can. And whatever you have to deal with, find positive ways to manage, cope, heal, and recover. Here’s the important thing about drama. It’s drama. It’s a conflict of intentions that creates an emotional response. If it is not drama that you need to or want to experience, then get it out of your life. Because drama creates stress, which causes inflammation, which leads to illness and disease. And you are an important person. You are valuable and irreplaceable. When you are happy and healthy you function better for yourself and for those around you. You are worth your love and self-care. And you are far more important than so much of the drama we experience every single day. So focus on what you can do, and you will feel the happy, healthy difference it makes in your life!

YAY!!!

Until next week …

Loving you so big and brightly!!! I’m sending you light and love to hug you the biggest!!!
May your days be drama-free, and when they can’t, surround yourself with people who will love you, support you, help you, and be the best with you!

Love and Big Hugs,

More Happiness from Mary Kate

Find more happiness, love, big hugs, support, gratitude, POSitude, and Self-Care in these POSitude cards!

Get Your POSitude On!

Feel happier! Supported! Loved! Hugged!

Bring brightness and goodness into your day, and into your life!

What beautiful souls like you think about their POSitude cards!

These cards remind me to stay positive and believe in myself!

Stephanie Shay, 4th grade teacher

Karen Henry, Retired 4^th Grade Teacher, Personal Assistant

Mary Freer, University Research Department Administrator

I love my POSitude cards! They are so cute, and the messages are very uplifting and inspiring!

Mary McMurtry, Retired Bookkeeper, Mom, Grandmom

You can find these POSitude cards in my new ETSY shop!!!

Looking for self-care to share love and big hugs for all ages?

Lub’s Very Happy Day! is filled with delightful brightness and big huggy smiles!

Lub is the happiest, PINKest, most love-filled monster, Ever! Her big, PINK heart is always with her, and it beams brightly in everything she does!

Lub loves you!

Join Lub as she shares with you her love and very happy, monster-ifically delightful day! Feel playful and bright, smile big, and be happy! Have fun and be cheerful!

You can find copies of Lub’s Very Happy Day! to adopt at Amazon!

What you give power, has power …

Hello Gorgeous Loves,

I haven’t always been strong. For a very long time, I wasn’t very strong at all. And there are still times when I don’t feel strong.

But there’s this thought in my head, this guiding principle I use to grow:

What you give power, has power.

This guiding thought is an offshoot of a quote:

“It all begins in your mind. What you give power to, has power over you.”
Leon Brown

Thank you Mr. Brown! I find his original quote helpful to me when thinking about facing my anxieties, and I am grateful for his words. To me, they tell me my anxiety is in my mind, and I can control it … which I try very hard to work on. This quote is a part of my Happy, Healing Place Toolbox of Goodness!

But today, I want to talk about my offshoot thought … What you give power, has power! To me, this version isn’t about something having control over you. This version is about growing. Taking something important to you and investing in it, so that it will grow and grow and grow.

What you give power, has power.

And I’m talking about you!

Me. You. All of us!

If you grow your love, your love will be powerful!
If you grow your self-confidence, your self-confidence will strengthen and become powerful!
If you grow your ability to self-care, your self-care will be powerful!
If you grow your self-worth, your self-worth will be powerful!

When you invest in you, you invest in your values and what you can do for yourself. You make yourself stronger, more self-reliant, more capable. Better prepared to handle life and its obstacles and challenges. You will be more open to the gifts of life. The goodness for you!

It doesn’t mean you won’t stumble or even fall, ever again. But that’s okay. You keep investing, learning, and growing. What you give power, has power.

When you give yourself power, you will have power!

It doesn’t mean you will always have to stand on your own if you don’t want to. You can surround yourself with people who will love you, care for you, grow with you, support you, and who will bring you up and walk forward with you. That way when life throws the hard curve balls, you don’t have do it all on your own. That’s just you being strong and knowing what you need, when you need it, and doing your best to be prepared for when life happens.

What you give power has power. Mary Kate Kopec. Love And Big Hugs. POSitude — Live with POSitude!

We aren’t born knowing how to be strong, but as we face life and learn the lessons it is teaching us, we can grow our strength. We learn who we are and what we are capable of. We learn what we need and want to grow – what we want to be better at or stronger at. This is all good!

In the process, we’ll fail, make mistakes, and need time to heal and grow. That’s okay. It’s how it works. What’s important is not letting our failures or mistakes bring us down (at least not for too long). Look at them for what they are, life’s learning and growing moments. Learn and grow, and become stronger. Also, it’s vital that we give ourselves the time we need to heal and grow. (No one else gets to determine what that amount of time is. It’s up to each of us. It’s individual. And it happens when it happens.)

The bottom line:

What you give power, has power.

So … will you give YOU power, so YOU have power? The power to love, laugh, be happy, be kind, find joy, feel gratitude, be healthy, be strong, be confident, be whatever you value … be your best you. It’s up to you, but for sure, what you give power, has power!

Ready to take my Arting It Up for Happiness and Healthiness: Color Me Happier 7 Day Challenge?

Arting It Up for Happiness and Healthiness Color Me Happier 7 Day Challenge Mary Kate Kopec Love and Big Hugs

Each day support your healthiness with feeling less stress, less anxiety, more happiness and more positivity!

Easy, fun, happy, silly, adorable, and totally supporting you!

7 days of Love and Big Hugs!

Delightfully cheerful & colorful art will lift & brighten your smile!

11 loving, big hugging, and supporting pages include proven happier and healthier promoting strategies:

Smile-making, positivity-promoting, happy coloring blocks
Gratitude Acknowledgements
Self-acknowledgement Reaffirmations
Includes “how to get the most out of this challenge” intro page & a summary reflection page

Arting It Up for Happiness and Healthiness Color Me Happier 7 Day Challenge Mary Kate Kopec Love and Big Hugs get button

You can also check out my new ETSY shop!!!

Get Your POSitude On!

Feel happier! Supported! Loved! Hugged!

Bring brightness and goodness into your day, and into your life!

Get inspired every day with a deck of my new POSitude cards! Available in my Etsy shop. Check them out and learn more, now!

Thank you for being here – my heart is bright with joy for you! May your day be powerful with you and filled with love and happiness!!!

Love and Big Hugs,

What to do when life falls down hard on you …

15 Habits for Happy Healthiness Mary Kate Kopec Love and Big Hugs

A beautiful blossom emailed me the other day. She told me she is going through some things, and that there isn’t anything she can do about it.

It truly sucks when life falls on you like this. It happens. It’s usually hard, seriously unfun, and oftentimes, it leaves us feeling terribly isolated, anxious, and depressed when it does.

So that’s what I want to talk to you about today. What in the world you can do when life falls on you, and the circumstances aren’t in your control? How can you feel better?

Spoiler alert … what can you do when life falls down hard on you? … you can take care of you … lemme explain …

How does taking care of you help?

When life gets hard, our survival mode usually kicks in, and our stress levels go up. If this life-falling event has a chronic, persistent flair to it – and it seems like it’s never going to end – our increasing stress levels can teach us how to ride a new, elevated baseline, which is great for coping. But for our long term health (mental, physical, emotional, … all of it) … it suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucks!!!!!

These stress levels attack our bodies through the increase of a hormone called cortisol. Cortisol is produced by your adrenals, which are little organs sitting on top of your kidneys. It can be fatiguing to your adrenals to be on the constant alert like this. And the long story short = stress leads to inflammation, and inflammation leads to unwellness, even disease.

So. Life happens. And when it happens hard and persistently, we can get hit with a double whammy. Not only do we have to deal with whatever the unpleasantness of the moment/time is, it can lead to physical illness, and that just ain’t good!

Sooooo. When you can’t fix life – when you are trying to cope and waiting for all the pieces to come together and get righted – this is most definitely the time for you to invoke your right to self-care! And then to make time for it! This is a something that you can definitely do!

And only you can do this.

Plus you get to decide how much time you give yourself. Balancing you against all of your commitments (family, work, household stuff … whatever your long list is that I know is calling you) … this balance is definitely a challenge. But you are important! You are worth your time! And the good news is that you can even start small and work your way up.

Let’s hit some highlights:

There’s basic biology.

You can eat nutritious food. Grab a banana, an apple, a can of sustainable, wild-life-safe, wild-caught tuna. Add a bag of frozen blueberries to your next bowl of oatmeal. Nutrient-dense food helps your body heal and decrease inflammation.

Drink your water. That whole 8 glasses of water a day is a real thing. It helps you keep your electrolytes balanced and to flush out toxins. This helps you to heal and to decrease inflammation. Plus, insufficient water can, among many things, give you headaches and make you feel hungry. And you don’t need that on top of everything else!

Get enough sleep. Sleep is rest. Rest heals you. You must sleep, my beautiful love muffin. It’s so important!!!

Get some exercise. Walk. Run. Ride a bike. Punch a punching bag. Do some yoga. Get your blood flowing; help your body breathe and nourish itself. Studies show yoga changes your brain chemistry – it helps to regulate nerve activity and reduces stress levels. It can induce a feeling of calm. This is helpful and so very good! Even 10 minutes a day is better than no minutes a day. Help yourself feel better!

Take an intentional, calming breath every day. Even if you only have a moment. You’re in your car sitting at a stop light. An elevator. Standing in the shower. … Take a moment. Close your eyes. Inhale deeply for a count of 4 to 7, hold it for 4 to 7, and then exhale slowly for 4 to 7. This breath is just for you. It’s your moment. Your time. Your healing. Let calm wash over you and hold you.

There’s positive energy reinforcements.

Practice POSitude. Think, focus, and act on positive thoughts.

Reaffirmations. Talk to yourself with positivity. You can do this! You will heal! You are worth your time! You are worth your love! You are wonderful and have so much to share and love!

Practice gratitude. Tell yourself every day at least one thing you are grateful for. The more heartfelt and genuine your gratitude, the more healing and calm it will bring you.

Smiling. Seriously … it helps! Smiling makes you feel better. Add in some positive self-talk, gratitude, calming breathing … it’s a formula for feel better.

Color or create something. Creative energies exercised change your thinking, reduce your stress and anxiety, and increase your calm. I recommend coloring with your favorite colors!!! This helps me tremendously!

Journal. Write it out. Get those thoughts racing around in your head out of your head. Write them down on paper. Acknowledge them. Acknowledge any limitation or frustration you feel. If any actionable thoughts come to mind, write them down and figure out a way to do them if it will help you cope or solve your problems. Write out your feelings about what’s happening. And remind yourself your feelings are 100% valid. You can’t control everything, but you can focus on what you can do. And you can love yourself for coping through this challenge.

Laugh! Laugh out loud. Watch something funny. Read a joke. But laugh heartily. Every day!

Connect with a loved one! Get a hug! Share a moment. Have a cup of herbal tea with a friend. Go for a walk together and be there for each other. Connect, love, and hug!!!!

Love yourself! Think of something you do well. Be genuine and heartfelt. Focus on this something and love yourself for it!

All of these are shown to change your brain chemistry and to help you to feel better. Happier. Even if only for the moment. You are still helping you to cope, heal, and reduce your stress. And this is helping you to keep healthy.

And one last, super helpful thing.

Surround yourself with love and support, with people who will bring you up, and help you walk forward through this difficult time! Good people – special family and friends – in your life can most definitely make all the difference in the world!

And in the times when you feel yourself not coping as well as you need, reach out for help. Get the help you need! Talk to your doctor, therapist, counselor, spiritual advisor, life coach … someone who can dig the extra deep with you to get you past this hump. Get the care and love and help and big hugs you need!

When life falls down hard on you and you feel like there’s nothing you can do, know that you CAN do something.

You can take care of you!

Self-care and self-love are vital – and these give you something helpful to focus on. It gives you actionables, and getting things done helps us to feel productive and useful. And the actionables I’ve shared above will also help you be happier and healthier, so you are getting so much bang for your taking-care-of-you bucks!

Every day, I remind myself: Focus on what you can do!

What can you do when life tackles you? You can self-care and self-love!!! Certainly, these may not make the life beat down you are getting go away any faster, but they will help you to cope better and stay healthier while you are dealing with it … and that’s just gotta be a good thing!

Want to dig even deeper into your Self-Care? Snag your copy of my “Mary Kate’s Be-Kind-to-You Interactive Self-Care Love Letter to You!”

Mary Kate'es Be-Kind-to-You Interactive Self-Care Love Letter to You!

When you find yourself feeling low, negative, unhappy – doubting yourself – maybe your confidence has taken a bit of a tumble & your self-worth is low …

Grab my Be-Kind-to-You Interactive Self-Care Love Letter to You!

You can start feeling better and start smiling again!

Filled with empathetic & supportive Love and Big Hugs!

Delightfully cheerful & colorful art will lift & brighten your smile!

14 loving, big hugging, and supporting pages include proven feel better strategies:

Reaffirmations & Positive Self-Talk
Gratitude Acknowledgements
Smiling POSitudes
Additional supporting ideas to help you find your calm and happiness again through self-care and self-love
Bonus Love-You Supports and Resources section

MKs Be Kind to You Interactive Self Care Love Letter to You Get Now button

You can also check out my new ETSY shop!!!

Get Your POSitude On!

Feel happier! Supported! Loved! Hugged!

Bring brightness and goodness into your day, and into your life!

Get inspired every day with a deck of my new POSitude cards! Available in my Etsy shop. Check them out and learn more, now!

Thank you for being here with me! May your day bring you heartwarming goodness and be filled with positive energy!!!

Love and Big Hugs,